Havana Cuba

A Southern Belles thought on Aging

I had some uncertainties about my birthday this year and actually was quite depressed about it! One question I had to ask myself was why did turning sixty depress me? Turning sixty for me at least, means time is running out!  I am convinced that I am not alone in this sentiment. I felt like my time to explore, love, laugh and live was running out .It was almost as if I was watching an hour glass with sand  trickling down and just realized that there was more sand in the lower half!

I decided to change my attitude, to turn this into an opportunity for emotional growth. With a renewed sense of purpose, I chose to travel out of the country for this momentous event. I picked Havana, Cuba and instantly started to undergo a metamorphosis! Suddenly the alarm altered into anticipation! I know longer ruminated about my age but instead became energized and excited about going somewhere new and discovering a new world. As I organized, I became even more passionate about my new adventure! I solicited some of my closest friends to travel with me. It became the trip of a lifetime it was a whopping birthday bash in Cuba!

My wonderful friends

I transformed to the extent that I now eagerly counted the days until my trip! My friend Ramona helped me plan this and I am ever so grateful. Ramona, Tara,  Merrissa and I flew together from Atlanta. We landed in Havana and our friend Pipar was waiting for us at the Airbnb. We walked around that evening getting acclimated with our surroundings and enjoying the warm Havana night and spectacular sunset over the Malecon. The next day was my birthday.  I did plan that day but told my friends whatever they wanted to do the rest of the trip was fine with me.

My birthday started out with a ride in a vintage 1957 red Chrysler Windsor convertible and a tour around Havana. Next was a photo shoot around famous landmarks and points of interest. Which took most of the day. After that, we showered and went to the Hotel Nacional for a delectable dinner (I had lobster) with drinks and guava cheesecake for dessert. They were wonderful to me as they brought me my dessert they serenaded me in Italian opera (I assumed it had something to do with happy birthday). Surreal is the way the night was already feeling. Next, we took a vintage car to Fabrica de Arte Cubano to enjoy the music and art. As we walked in the entrance, a young woman asked if we wanted to participate in an art show. They were having a show with a well-known Cuban artist in February and they enticed  two of my friends and myself. The artist was photographing people for his next exhibit. We said yes and I was enchanted to meet the artist and pose for him to forever be immortalized in art. How many times in your life do you get that chance? We walked around after that drinking mojitos and enjoyed the art and music! My friend said to me as we were leaving that it would be hard to top that birthday. She was absolutely right it was memorable in every way.

The next few days were equally blissful we went to Santa Maria Del Mar and had an serene, tranquil day  on the beach soaking up the sun , sipping Cerveza and dipping our toes in the Caribbean sea.  When we finished there, we went back home and got ready for a Cuban show and dinner. It was probably the least favorite thing I did on the trip. It seemed catered to the cruise ship visitors and I would have much preferred a “real” Cuban show. The highlight of that evening was smoking Cuban cigars on the veranda of our apartment. I had completed my list of things I wanted to do in Cuba with that one! The last day we walked over 10 miles exploring central Havana and Old Havana. I took some of my most memorable photos that day. One of the most enchanting parts of that trip was riding around in the vintage cars. It brought back childhood memories and made my heart smile. Those vintage cars make Havana extraordinary and unique. It was the trip of a lifetime, making wonderful memories with my friends.

I have had many vicissitudes in this life but I really would not change a thing about it. It has been a fascinating journey so far. I have written books and had the pleasure of seeing those published, traveled the world, met numerous Rock Stars, a president (Carter), Royalty (Sarah Ferguson) and loved deeply. I am blessed in this life with fantastic friends and a wonderful family. 

Never, have I ever stopped believing in the infinite possibility of this life or lost my childlike joy. I have not found the fountain of youth or won the lottery but there is still time for that!

Sunset in Havana

There are times in our life when we focus so intently on the number that we lose sight of the fact that we still have a lot of life left to live. My advice is quit concentrating on the negative, just live, and live well.

My Birthday kiss!

Me modeling

Love the cars

Ramona and I at the photo shoot

This Southern Belle's got GRITS!

 “A small event as tiny as a drop of a pin can change the direction of your entire life” 
- Bangambiki Habyarimana, Pearls Of Eternity

Southern Belle's have a gift for taking even the worst situation and turning it in something to laugh about! I mean we are after all steel magnolias! I have had a wonderful life so far (that's me putting those lemons in my sweet tea). My life has NOT been easy but I wouldn't change a thing. Each one of those hardships (cancer, divorce,childhood illness, a staph infection that tried to kill me, death of a loved one and growing up poor) has taught me a valuable lesson and I would even say they made me a better person.

Cancer taught me about what was important in my life! My children, my family and enjoying each day to its fullest. It also gave me a sense of humor! I bought a t-shirt that read "Yes they are fake the real ones tried to kill me"After the big C who takes anything serious? I mean it's all small stuff after that! Cancer was just a chapter in my life not my whole story! 

Divorce taught me to let go of the past and toxic relationship (I'm working on my next divorce husband #2 has real issues). The reason for our soon to be divorce is for religious reasons, he thinks he's  god and I don't! You can love someone but it still not be a healthy marriage. He is an alcoholic and loves his alcohol more than anything. I wish them sincere happiness! My first ex and I are good friends now, I'm not sure my second ex and I will be. Maybe when I've had time to heal we can be friends! I mean can I pick them or what? I'm not sure what that says about me? I think I must be a little on the crazy side!

Being poor taught me that you really don't need much to survive. Also compassion for those less fortunate than myself. It also taught me the importance of education. Education is the key out of poverty! Every Southern Belle knows this! I mean we were so poor growing up that I couldn't pay attention! I swear to the Lawd that food was so scarce around our house that even the mice left for better hunting grounds! Now we were rich in love and creativity. My mother could make a gourmet meal out of anything! Boy could that woman cook with a few ingredients from the cupboard she could make magic! Money isn't everything but without it and an education you have a tough road ahead.

Childhood illness actually stole some of my innocence which is sad, but it also taught me that life is a never ending circle of good times and bad times. It also taught me that attitude is everything! I learned my survival skills in childhood and it has served me well my whole life. Losing both my parents was a hard lesson but it made me appreciate the memories of my life in small town Clay Ky so much more. I cherish all those wonderful times and crazy memories. Life is never what we think it should be but it's our ability to turn it into a life we love that defines us. Embrace the good and bad, love everything about your life and learn to smile even on the bad days because you know the good times are just around the corner.

The Southern Belle's guide to Southern Religion

                                                                           

I'm going to write about Southern Religion today. It's about as complex as brain surgery. We take our religion very seriously down here. I'm not taking about the football game kind of religion; although I did read a book once title "Gods in Alabama" and they were talking about football players. I'll save the other Southern Religion of football for another blog. That’s not the kind I'm talking about, today is the going to the prayer meeting on Wednesday night and to hear the gospels on Sunday morning! Sexy southern Belle's and Church are as inviting a pecan pie laced with Jack Daniels! 

There are 2 types of churches in the south we have the Baptist and the Methodist (there are more churches but most people in the south only acknowledge these two). The Methodist held its first meeting in Georgia in January of 1831 and the Baptist church was organized in 1784. They are a little more uppity because they feel like they have seniority over the Methodist. The Baptist also feel like only those who have been baptized can have holy communion, where the Methodist say come one, come all break bread and have a drink with us (they have way more fun with the drinking part)! Also there is the whole debate about immersion or sprinkling when it comes to baptism. There are a few things they both agree on Sin, Forgiveness, Grace and Prayer. So let’s talk about those and how Southern Belles feel about them.

One thing about Southern religion that confuses me is how serious some people take it. Most Belles will tell you that the only difference between a prayer and a curse is the person who stands to profit from it. Curses sometimes can benefit most any Belle especially if it’s a "Bless her heart" curse. Prayers can be a bit subtler and one never knows if the answer comes from the almighty or from your own sense of revenge or self-preservation. Praying does make a Belle feel better about things. She can pray and tell the Lawd anything she wants and ask for everything she wants! Of course it doesn't mean she will get it but it sure is nice thinking about it! I mean if you're praying for your ex-husband to get run over by a bus and the slut he ran off with to get the crabs, I personally think that is a justifiable prayer. I know some will say get down on your knees and pray for the Lawd to forgive them of their sins. I think the Lawd has a sense of humor and feel confidant that the slut will get crabs! 

We Belles like to talk about others sins without drawing to much attention to our own. It’s true in our beloved south that the sins of the mother are often visited upon their daughters. Lawd help them Belle's if their mother's sins are reckless, willful, lustful, immoral and just plain shameless! That poor Belle doesn't stand a snowball's chance in hell of ever recovering. Southern Belles have a recklessness in their souls that cry out for bad boys and sin! I tell you the truth a clean living, hardworking man just doesn't stand a chance! They turn the Belles heart to ice but a wicked bad boy will make her lips part with a sigh and her legs spread open like the pearly gates of heaven (most of those bad boys think they've gone to heaven when a Belle spreads her legs). Yes, sin for a Belle can be most enjoyable!

I tell you a passionate woman and church go together like oil and water; they just don't mix! Every man in the church gazes upon her with lust in his heart (which is a sin). Why even the preacher who looks out over his congregation looks upon her and finds himself wanting to worship at her alter of love. Then he preaches endless on the sins of lust while secretly desiring after her. Sin is even a challenge for the preacher when he has a hot, sexy Belle sitting in his church! So why should the rest of us worry about sin? Well we all have to answer to the good Lawd but let’s remember we all have our sins. 

Forgiveness is really a leap of faith and the good Lawd only know it’s a 50/50 chance where you will land or if you will be shattered by your fall from grace. We can't talk about sin without talking about forgiveness! I can assure you every Southern Belle needs forgiving for something! Without it well, we  Belles would all just be fallen angels. I mean Heaven would be empty without the Lawd forgiving all us sinners! Now personally I'm not the forgiving and forgetting type of Belle as I'm not the Lawd nor do I have Alzheimer's! If I'm forgiving you then you need to worry, as I'm still thinking about  where to bury your body! Then I guess that would go back to sin and then I'd have to ask the Lawd for forgiving!  I tell you it's a never ending cycle! What's a Belle to do?

Grace has nothing to do with being “worthy” of it, Jesus died for our sins, we are all washed clean by his blood. The prostitute, drug addict, rapist and child molester have the gift of grace as well. This was hard for me to understand and accept at first. No sin is exempt from grace. I did think the "other" woman" should be exempt and should burn in hell but then again I'm not the good Lawd! Grace is given to everyone and it's a good thing! It doesn’t matter how big or small the sin. Indeed, we are all sinners in either word or action! Why we Belles all have shameful moments deep in our hearts that we don’t want people to know about. It's a good thing we have grace or us Belles would be lost souls for sure! I mean us poor Belles we have lusted after bad boys, thought about murdering our husbands, gossiped about our more indiscreet Belles, prayed for the other woman to gets crabs and Bless our hearts we even lead a preacher or two astray! I think we need the Lawd's grace for sure!

I will sum this up life without the good Lawd is like an un-sharpened pencil there is just no point!

Enjoy Y'all

The Southern Belle's Unspoken Rules to live by...

I'm a born and bred "Southern Belle" and very proud of this fact; hard-headed and hot-blooded that's me. Now I have a saying about Southern women (yes me not my grandma) Southern women are good at making sweet tea, potato salad, love and revenge. Whoever said "Hell has no fury like a woman scorned" was surely talking about a woman from the south. Southern women do know how to get their revenge, keyed cars, flat tires, windows broken, and just plain ole cat fights are not beneath us. It's not because we really want the jerk; it's just we don't want you picking through our trash so to speak!




I have heard some crazy stories about women. One about this Southern Belle walking in and finding her new black stilettos and her best friend both wrapped around her boyfriend and I can tell you the aftermath from that fallout was like a nuclear explosion! She pitched a good old fashion hissy fit! Everybody in the place knew just what she thought of them both as she ripped her black stilettos off her friend. She was madder about the shoes than her boyfriend as men were like buses and another one was just around the corner. In the "other woman's" defense she was from up North and all us good Southern girls know she just can't have a Yankee girlfriend. She just doesn't get all this southern stuff!



I do however have a friend from up North and she has been in the south almost 16 years and has just earned her "Southern Belle in Training" T-shirt. Yes, sometimes it takes that long to get it! I mean the woman didn't even know what a grit was when she moved here! Y'all was a foreign word and she just didn't understand what all this "fixin" stuff was about. Fixin dinner, fixin to go to the movies, fixin you sister up with the football player, fixin to shut your mouth for you and fixin to get all gussied up! Yes she did not have any idea about that one Southern word and all its meanings.

Here are my Southern Bell's Unspoken Rules we live by.....



Rule# 1. A man will believe anything if it's coming out of pouty pink lips with a Southern drawl.



Rule# 2. Any good Southern girl knows if you want to get a man's attention you need to start from the waist down because that is where his brain is.



Rule# 3. A Southern Belle knows how to make hard men melt like butter and soft men as hard as steel.



Rule# 4. A Southern Belle knows the secret to getting a man to do what you want is to let him think it was his idea in the first place.



Rule# 5. If a Southern Belle tells you "Isn't that nice “or "Bless your- heart"...It ain't a compliment!



Rule# 6. A Southern Belle's laugh is sexy as sin and full of promise.



Rule# 7. A Southern girl learns to wiggle her hips in high heels at the age of 5 and the older she gets the better she gets.



Rule# 8. Don't make a Southern Belle take her pearls off because this means it's going to get ugly!



Rule# 9 If a Southern Belle tells you things are gonna get ugly, then my advice to you friend is RUN, (southern gentlemen already know this and they are the first under the table)!!!!


Rule# 10. A Southern Belle knows every button to push to make men (and northern girls) fuming mad (we were taught this in grade school). Then we just sit back, laugh and enjoy the show.



Rule# 11. A Southern Belle is alluring, crafty and always a sultry femme fatale (Just watch "Body Heat" with Kathleen Turner).



Rule# 12. A Southern Belle knows the secret to keeping a man  blissfully happy is making sure his belly is full and his nuts are empty (an old wise Southern Belle told me this one)


As any good southern girl knows just because you know the rules doesn't mean you can't break them.


Enjoy Y'all



This Southern Belle's Summer Travels and Adventures



The Acropolis Athens Greece

 By now most of you know I have a gypsy soul with a serious case of wanderlust. I also seem to have an adventurous spirit that most men feel intimidated by hmm… I guess that means I just haven’t met the right man yet! Hopefully the right man will come along and will be filled with a longing to experience other cultures and exotic places like me. But that is not what this blog is about today. Today I wanted to write about my passion for travel.

Every summer when school lets out I start thinking about where I want to wander off too. This year is no different, some years I have more resources than others so I can travel to far off places like Greece, Italy, Australia, Germany, Great Britain and Alaska. Other years I have to settle for domestic travel and I find that enjoying as well. I brought a book once and it had all these amazing places (that you never hear about) in the U.S.A to see. Now granted some of those places may give you a chuckle and you will never want to see them again but other times you catch a moment of something so rare and beautiful that it takes your breath.





I was in Wyoming one summer and I was just driving down the interstate all by myself, the sun was starting to rise and I thought what a great picture this would make. Little did I know after I stopped and got my camera out the sun was a magnificent orange ball of light in the sky and just as I clicked my shutter on the camera I realized that I had captured not only the sunrise but a wolf as well. Who seemed to be as intrigued with me as I with him? I was spellbound by the beauty of that moment.

My sister Julie and me on that fun filled day!

I have had many such moments in my travels. It becomes imprinted on your soul and you know it doesn’t matter how long you live you will always remember that moment. My sister Julie and I were in Amberg, Germany in June. We had decided to walk to the local market to get our dinner, it was a beautiful summer evening. She and I stopped at a sidewalk cafe and decided to start our dinner early with a glass of wine and a cheese and fruit tray. The gentleman was so entertaining he told us story after story that had us laughing. He kept giving us drinks, the sun was starting to set and the place became almost magical at that moment and I thought to myself don’t forget this gift that God has given you. It brought tears to my eyes as I looked at my sister laughing and joking with him. I felt so alive in that moment. As the evening came to a close my sister and I left singing “Pretty Woman” as we walked away from our admiring friend.





Pipar and our new Italian Friends

Another precious moment was when I was in Florence Italy with my friend Pipar. I had made reservation at a little out of the way place recommended by Rick Steve’s (Europe through the backdoor author) and when we got there the lady spoke NO English. I kept trying to tell her my name and she kept calling me Ellen (that is my middle name). I had given her my credit card info on the phone but apparently all she could remember was Ellen she finally took us to our accommodations and they were quaint. We pulled out a map in our room and by then her adorable husband had joined us and they tried desperately in Italian to tell Pipar all about something she needed to see in Florence. I was laughing so hard that it brought tears to my eyes and I thought what a darling couple they made as she would tell him NO and shake her head and he would just smile slyly and shake his head. They were just so cute and I thought this is what real traveling is all about. It’s not the Uffizi or Michelangelo’s David that made Florence memorable but this sweet little couple made it unforgettable.






Homer Alaska

 Another heart print I have was on the trip my ex-husband and I took our son’s Joshua and Jake on. We decided to travel the Alaska/Canadian highway. What and adventure that was! We traveled all across the United States and up through the rugged road to White Horse Yukon, then on into Alaska. When we got to a little place called Chicken, Alaska population 37 people and 1 grumpy old man. We decided to pan for gold there and try to get rich. There was absolutely nothing to see in Chicken but the conversation I had with the few locals and 1 visiting Irishman more than made up for it! The lilt to his booming voice and jovial nature made everyone there smile and laugh out loud. He kept telling his very American wife that she needed to make their fortunes and he would take a sip of Irish whiskey and toast her hard work! Jake had so much fun playing in the creek he needed a good bath before he got back in the truck. Our son Joshua said it best when he said it was the greatest adventure of his life when he stepped out of the truck and saw the vast wilderness of Alaska. I will never forget the look on his face if I live to be a hundred. We may not have found our fortune but there was a bit of golden moments at the end of the day.






Me, Marty, Ramona and Jackie on our Great Adventure!

One of the funniest moments of my travels was in Belgium. My ex-husband and I were traveling with our good friends Ramona and Jackie. We boarded a train in Belgium to head back to Amberg, Germany. Jackie and Ramona where taking their time before boarding the train (buying beer). Marty and I were already seated and waiting, when all of the sudden Jackie sticks his head in the train and asks if we have any cash because they didn’t have enough to pay for the beer. So we dig out what English money and German money we have to give to him; when all of the sudden the conductor asks for our tickets and stamps them then we heard a chime, Jackie snatches the money from our hand and we both have this puzzled look on our face. Then we look out the train window and see Jackie throw our money at the man working the beer stand and proceeds to grab Ramona with one hand and the beer with the other and starts running like a crazy man dragging her behind him like a rag doll. They get on the train and Jackie is as white as a ghost and Ramona is confused, Marty and I are about to wet ourselves were laughing so hard. Finally Ramona asks Jackie what the hell was that all about and he is so shaken he can barely talk but the words out of his mouth were priceless. I thought when I heard the chimes the train was going to leave without you and I had to go and save you. Well we sat there on the tracks for another 20 minutes before we took off and Jackie was still so shook up he couldn’t even drink one of those beers! Priceless, I tell you just priceless!



Plaza de Armas Arequipa Peru

I’ve climbed castle ruins in Germany, the Harbor Bridge, rode a camel, held Kolas and fed kangaroos in Australia, dangled from castle ruins in Austria. I swam in the Great Barrier Reef and stood at the Acropolis. I have seen the death camps in Germany and the Rhine River. I have seen Buckingham Palace and Edinburgh Castle, took the Teapot trail, had a Medieval dinner at Ruthin Castle in Wales and I have beheld the White City of Peru. The best Pizza in the world I found was in Anchorage Alaska and it's The Moose's Tooth Pizza! OMG it's the best ever and of course my summer fishing for salmon on the Kenai River in Alaska was awesome as well! Yet the most memorable things about these trips were the people I met. The guy who owned The Griffin Pub in Toddington, England. Brian Coombes who invited us over and we stayed there well past closing time sharing stories about his trip to America. When he first saw Marty and Jackie he said I know you, you’re Rednecks from the south! And of course Keith and Edna Brown my dear Australian friends whom I keep in contact with! Mrs. Hammer from Germany and her wonderful kitchen! Takis from Athens who gave me a silver necklace and earrings with the Greek design and took us to his friends place to eat lamb in the Plaka,  And last but not least Victoria, Diana and Hector in Arequipa Peru, Friends for life as well. It’s the people not the places that make my travels wonderful; it’s the variety of these places and people that I love.





My friends Keith and Edna Brown

So where am I off to this summer? I will go back to Peru on a Mission Trip and hopefully see Machu Pichu this time as well as the beautiful North Carolina beach, and then I will spend some time getting to know more about the country music capitol of the U.S Nashville Tn. with my mother. Who knows who I will meet and how they will influence my life. I have Faith that God is in control and wherever I wander it will be with his blessings. So wish me luck on my new adventure and stay tuned for photos and stories! Y'all enjoy!




Billabong Sanctuary Townsville Australia

 



 "To travel is to possess the world"~Burton Holmes

Würzburg Germany







Medieval Banquet at Ruthin Castle Wales

 

“Not all those who wander are lost.” – J. R. R. Tolkien





Sitting In the Piazze Navona Rome Italy




Venice Italy



Greek Island

Lima Peru

Nashville Tn at The Cock of the Walk Restaurant

“Our battered suitcases were piled on the sidewalk again; we had longer ways to go. But no matter, the road is life.” – Jack Kerouac

Castle Ruins Austria




 “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

Plaka Athens Greece

“We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and adventure. There is no end to the adventures we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open.” – Jawaharial Nehru

I'm  the last one on the right and living my life to the fullest! Sydney Harbor Bridge Australia!

A Southern Belle's Just Gotta Tell You The Truth

People look at us and think we are just plain stupid! I understand how they could believe that. I mean if you ever turn on the TV you are bound to find at least one show set in the south staring some unusual characters.

I think the real reason the south wanted to secede from the north was we just got tired trying to explain ourselves to folks who just didn't get us. People from up north watch all the shows on TV depicting some of our more colorful characters and assume we are all ignorant, dim-witted, backwoods, drunkards who don't know the difference between caviar and fish guts. Although I will say even our colorful characters on TV have used what they have been blessed with to make an insane amount of money. Then of course they laugh all the way to the bank at the people from up north, out west and anywhere else in this world. So perhaps they are not as brainless as people would like to believe.

To be honest I'm not sure why anyone with half a brain would want to watch those show in the first place. I mean what does that say about all of the people in the world who watch that crap!  Johnny Depp was once quoted as "Being morbidly fascinated" with "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" . My dear departed mother used to watch that show and thought the child was cute. In defense of my mother she thinks every child is cute.

I mean there are people making millions of dollars on reality shows. Not all of the crazy ones are from the south. I personally watched one episode of "Keeping Up With the Kardashian's" and decided I didn't need too. I got more excitement watching my neighbors on a Saturday night! It always gets exciting around 11:00 pm when the sheriff shows up. You can hear him yelling "What in the name of Jesus are you shooting at this time of night Earl?"  By the way he didn't care that he was shooting just wanted to know what at? Same thing with "I Am Caitlyn"  why would I want to watch a show where you can't decide who you are? I mean really as any good Southern Belle will say "Honey if you don't know who you are at age 65 then you ain't ever gonna know! Switching teams at that age well all I can say is bless her/his little heart.

I guess on a final note I will say this. Crazy lives everywhere in this old world. The only difference between my beloved South and the rest of the world is simple. We put crazy on the front porch and serve it sweet tea!

Now y'all have a great day!